10 Things I Remembered about Money in 30 Days…

“The only people who don’t have insane relationships with money are those who were willing to examine their insane relationships with money.” ~ Geneen Roth Lost and Found: One Woman’s Story of Losing Her Money and Finding Her Life.

In June this year, I felt inspired to take my relationship with money to coaching.

Without going in to too much detail (as I wrote about it here, here and here), I realised it was more about my thoughts / feelings around money than actual money per se and realise that they mattered. So what were the 10 things I remembered about money in 30 days?

10 Things I Remembered About Money in 30 Days…

1. It’s better to pay attention to one thing for 30 days than to pay attention to 10 things in 30 days or even 10 things for 3 days each (for me start to develop a habit and the process of mastery with money).
2. Financial freedom is not about having more money – it is more about aligning and organising our life so we spend money on what we value. “If being rich made people happy, wouldn’t all rich people be happy?” ~ Author Unknown.
3. We cannot change what we refuse to confront and it takes courage to change – yes I chose to pay attention to my relationship with money and not avoid it any longer (even though I was fearful). Yes, some days it was painful and challenging, however I got through it. I can now see that my challenge with money has helped me be more responsible (and not self-sabotage), get organised, pay closer attention, own my story and create greater love in my life (i.e. money didn’t do anything ‘TO’ me it did it ‘FOR’ me). I am grateful for all of my experiences. As Brené Brown wrote in The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are ~ “Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy—the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.”
4. Money doesn’t exist – it is our own meaning, feelings (i.e shame, sadness and embarrassment) and interpretation of money that exists. Just like debt – it is not good or bad – we have to see our own judgements and meanings (and I was VERY critical of myself).
5. My lack of financial wellbeing was linked to my own lack of self-value/worthiness, self-care, self-love and my perception of failing. I realised the more I payed attention to my relationship with money, my relationship with my self changed and I became more present and loving in my own life. “It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all-in which case, you fail by default.” ~ J. K. Rowling
6. There is enough money for everyone – just like oxygen there is enough money to go around and allowing ourselves to be all that we are, helps other people step up and shine their own light. “Your own Self-Realization is the greatest service you can render the world.” ~ Ramana Maharshi.
7. It’s important to make sure our intentions embrace who and where we are NOW (i.e radical self-compassion and acceptance), not who or where we want to be in the future. Yes, we have to be honest (i.e. not live in DENIAL – Don’t Even Notice I Am Lying) with ourselves and not pretend we are something we are not. “The truth will set you free.” ~ Unknown
8. Living abundantly with your heart doesn’t have to relate to spending a lot of money. We can enjoy the gifts of life without spending lots of money, however it is important to get clear about what we would like in our life. “If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away.” ~ Henry David Thoreau
9. The best time is NOW – yes the best time to start my journey, forgive myself and pay attention to my relationship with money was NOW, not tomorrow or when I am in a relationship – I am already complete and whole (I just had to unlearn some beliefs and behaviours). “With the past, I have nothing to do; nor with the future. I live now.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson.
10. To make a change, we just need to know and take the first step. It doesn’t need to be a big step, just a small finite step is enough. For example – if you are wanting to start exercising – “joining a gym” may not be a clear enough step. However, “call Karen to find out what gym she recommends” is a clearer step and you can easily schedule it in your calendar on a specific date and time). “You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.” ~ Martin Luther King Jr.

Questions for Reflection –

• Which insights resonated with you the most?
• What insights would you like to share that you believe with your whole heart?